Human Voices
by John Hitchens
Summary: Ami and her mother struggle with their relationship


We have lingered in the chambers of the sea  
By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown  
Till human voices wake us, and we drown.  
  
- T.S. Eliot, "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock"  
  
  
  
She knew it was futile from the moment she turned the key in  
the lock. There is an instinct, basic in humans, buried deep  
perhaps within the reptilian cortex, that alerts the body to the  
presence of another organism. It may be the mind's recognition  
of subtle temperature changes, sub-auditory respiratory noises  
and peripheral movement, combining with the usual signs of human  
activity such as activated light switches, the hum of electricity  
or the background drone of televisions. The lack of these  
suggests a vacant house. Whatever it was that penetrated her  
awareness, Ami was feeling that disquieting sense of emptiness  
now.  
  
Opening the door lost its former anticipatory zeal. The  
moment she had looked forward to all day had just turned to ashen  
disappointment. But maybe she was wrong, and somebody was home.   
She pushed open the door, shouldered her pack and stepped inside.  
  
She was not wrong. It was dim in the hallway, the only  
light coming from the late afternoon rays slanting through the  
window blinds. The apartment was silent, except for the faint  
bubbling from the fish tank. She carefully slipped off her  
shoes, hesitated, then stepped into the dining room with her  
shoulders in their familiar hunch.   
  
There would be a note. There always was. She and her  
mother were good at notes. It was safer, easier, far less  
vulnerable than simple human contact. She turned on the overhead  
chandelier.  
  
Arranged on the round art-deco table, in tasteful style, was  
a bowl of fruit. Mundane fare like starfruit, lychees and  
bananas propped up exotics like apples, pears and strawberries.   
A relish tray, replete with pickled ginger, sunomono, and other  
assorted delicacies lay beside a special treat - sandwiches. Egg  
salad, tuna salad, and her favourite, peanut butter and jelly,  
were carefully stacked. A pair of delicate blue and white  
teacups set off a china teapot with tea caddy. Two modern  
kitchen stools in black metal tubing all but completed the scene.   
The last touch to this tableau was the precisely squared letter  
on her place setting. Ami fixated on the note, and plucked the  
scrap of paper from the table.  
  
Ami  
  
Mrs Matsushiki went into labour a few days earlier than  
expected. Sorry to miss our appointment again. This  
time we will make it up - is Saturday lunchtime good  
for you? Please help yourself to dinner. I'll be home  
late.  
  
Love,  
Mom  
  
She remained silent, varied thoughts chasing around her  
brain. Anger, frustration, even a bit of hate crept into the  
whirlwind of seething thoughts. That last thought she ruthlessly  
crushed, ashamed of her feelings.  
  
My mother is a good person.  
  
My mother is a good person. She repeated that thought. She  
deserved the support of her only child. She ran her clinic, took  
professional upgrade classes in the evening. lectured all over  
Japan, and had more patients than she could cope with. All  
without the support of a husband. They had made an attempt to  
set aside Wednesday afternoons as sacred mother-daughter time.   
The idea was to lay aside their respective responsibilities and  
just spend time with each other. It was merely unfortunate that  
their first three attempts had been aborted. There would always  
be another time. She could get Rei to shift the Saturday senshi  
meeting to... to... to when? She would have to figure that one  
out. She gave up on that for the time being, and turned to more  
pressing matters.  
  
She hooked one of the stools out from the table with her  
foot, perched herself on it, and took her schoolbooks out of her  
bag. She scanned her list. She was ten chapters ahead in both  
math and history, and she had completed her English assignment  
during class time. That left just three subjects. She looked at  
her watch. Three subjects, ninety minutes. Should be enough  
time - just. Then she would have to scramble to get to cram  
school, then perhaps a bit more homework, followed by a monster  
attack and what WAS she doing, a young girl dressed in a short,  
short skirt in the middle of the night and then four hours of  
sleep if she was lucky before school started again...  
  
She stopped herself. Usagi could handle it, albeit by not  
doing her homework. There would be time for self-pity later.   
She grasped a sandwich and started to chew, not even noticing  
what flavour it was, as with the other hand she flipped open her  
first book.  
  
Physics. This was pretty easy. She let her Mercury  
computer crunch some numbers. She let herself crunch an apple.   
Sometimes, being Sailor Mercury had its advantages. She paused  
over the next subject.  
  
Japanese composition.  
  
It was a simple assignment, really. Just write a poem. Not  
something the computer could do. Not really something she could  
do. Ten minutes of scribbling produced only frustration.   
Perhaps it was time to take a different tack. Think of it like  
painting. Approach it around the edges, don't force it or  
overanalyze it, just let it flow. She read the haiku that  
resulted:  
  
fragile butterfly  
dancing on the edge of oblivion  
settles on a flower  
  
Not bad. She spent a few minutes trying to decide what it  
meant. She spent a few more trying to improve it. She shrugged;  
it would have to do. She brought out her last subject.  
  
The chemistry problems were easy yet interesting. She loved  
balancing chemical equations. Unfortunately, there were a lot  
of them. By the time she finished, it was time to leave for cram  
school.  
  
She glanced at the food on the table. Her stomach confirmed  
the information her eyes conveyed. It was hardly touched. Oh  
well, there would be time to eat later. Later, it was always  
later. It seemed there would be time to do many things later.  
  
She was still in her school uniform. She threw a pink  
cardigan over her shoulder, grabbed her pack and headed out the  
door without a backwards glance at the crumpled up note on the  
table.  
  
  
Human Voices  
  
  
A story  
of   
Sailor Moon  
  
  
by  
John Hitchens  
  
Dedicated to: Sherri-Lee Lavender Thornton,  
in friendship  
  
  
DISCLAIMER: This story takes place at the beginning of  
the Sailor Moon S season, and replaces episode ninety. The story  
contains some disturbing subject matter and graphic violence, and   
is recommended for mature audiences.  
  
  
  
  
The sun was sinking gloriously in the sky when she got home.   
She didn't notice. She was tired, and in a hurry, and maybe,  
just maybe, she could catch her daughter at home. She tapped her  
foot while the elevator carried her upwards. She was out the  
doors before they had fully opened, and almost racing down the  
corridor. She fumbled with her keys before managing to open the  
apartment door.  
  
No lights were on. Perhaps Ami had gone to bed early. She  
checked her daughter's room. Nothing. The couch was likewise  
empty. She stepped into the dining room and noticed the hardly  
touched food and the crumpled note.  
  
Poor thing. Her daughter was a hard worker and a good  
person. She was always out late, either at cram school, at the  
library studying, or tutoring a friend. She wished her daughter  
would do more things for herself. The last few years had been  
hectic for them both, which is why she had recently decided to  
set aside some time each week just for the two of them. Three  
straight emergencies had made a mockery of her plans, but she was  
cancelling her weekend lecture in Osaka to make up for it. It  
was time to start being a mother again. Ami would be starting to  
need her now in her teenage years.  
  
She put the kettle on to boil, and helped herself to a  
sandwich. As she sat there, she mused about the times she and  
Ami would make cookies together. That was, hmmm, Ami was now  
fifteen - ten years ago?! She had, she realized, missed her  
daughter growing up. It was a wonder that the scholarship offer  
in Germany last year hadn't woken her up sooner.  
  
It was strange, she thought, the dichotomy within her  
daughter. Just like her father, she shied away from  
confrontation, preferring to be seen as wrong than to risk an  
argument. Meek, shy, quiet. Perhaps she was driving away her  
daughter the way she drove away her husband.  
  
On the other hand, Ami could also be very competitive.   
First in all subjects, she worked to maintain that. She hated to  
lose at chess, and was working hard on her own to study the  
subjects she would need to be a doctor. Which is why turning  
down that German scholarship rang such a strange note. She could  
see Ami in her mind's eye - a much younger Ami.  
  
"When I grow up, I want to be a doctor just like you."  
  
So why didn't she go abroad? Was it lack of self-  
confidence? It couldn't be because of the unlikely friends she  
had made? Well, now they would get the time to talk about it.   
That, and other things.  
  
Drinking the tea did nothing to soothe her restlessness.   
The hall clock chiming 8:30 set her decision. It was a nice  
evening; Ami had probably gone down to the library - she would  
walk down and meet her. They'd go to the local cafe and chat a  
bit. This new resolve lifted her spirits. Ten minutes later she  
was locking the door and heading down to the library with a  
spring in her step.  
  
* * *  
  
The students filed out as the buzzer went. Ami stayed at  
her desk. She had to decide where she wanted to go. The empty  
apartment was unappetizing. She was mildly surprised to realize  
that she wanted company. She considered her options. Usagi was  
out with a friend. Minako? Too hyper for her when she was this  
tired. Rei? No, too demanding. Makoto would be nice. No,  
wait, it's her karate night. She decided on the usual.  
  
Juuban Public Library was a beautiful mixture of Japanese  
modernism and traditional architecture. Just walking through the  
doors was a soothing experience. The excitement of new books  
awaiting, combined with the familiarity of old surroundings,  
rewarded her with a comfortable and pleasurable sense of being.   
Except for today.  
  
Today she didn't feel at ease. After pushing her homework  
around for a quarter of an hour, she decided to back up her books  
and go home. There was nowhere else to go. At the exit, she met  
Osaka Naru, also on her way out.  
  
"Naru-chan! What are you doing here? I thought you were  
with Usagi-chan, eating pizza and studying."  
  
Osaka Naru was not usually described as beautiful. Pretty,  
or cute, were the most often used words. She had freckles and  
permed auburn hair, and her long limbs displayed a disarming  
coltishness. Her clothes were always costly and in taste, and  
her manners hinted at wealth. Tonight she was wearing a tailored  
brown jacket and skirt.  
  
"Hi Ami-chan! Usagi-chan went home after dinner."  
  
"Home? But you were supposed to be ..."  
  
"Studying? Yes, but she said she was too tired and full to  
study anymore, and was going to bed early."  
  
"And to read manga ...", Ami said.  
  
Naru laughed.  
  
"Probably. Anyway, my Mom was working late at the store, so  
I came down here to study."  
  
"You too? Usagi-chan is lucky to have her mother home all  
the time. And to have a father."  
  
"Yes. I miss mine too."  
  
They both looked a little bit wistful, standing there for a  
minute. Ami still felt a little shy around Naru, so she extended  
a tentative feeler.  
  
"We both live in the same area. Would you like some company  
while you walk home?"  
  
She could see Naru light up.  
  
"Oh sure, that would be great! I feel so much safer not  
being alone, what with all the monsters that always seem to be  
trying to eat me."  
  
"Well, let's hope that doesn't happen tonight!"  
  
"Agreed."  
  
They both laughed, the awkward moment forgotten. The walk  
was peaceful until they passed the park. There, the animated  
tree took them completely by surprise.  
  
* * *  
  
The daimon egg, possessed with a limited intelligence and  
rudimentary sensing devices, was winging its way to the temple  
chosen for it as the most likely place to find a pure heart. Its  
plans went awry when it passed a really strong signature - two  
pure hearts in one place, not ten yards from it. The egg  
adjusted its priorities, and embedded itself in the nearest  
object at hand - a tree.  
  
The egg absorbed itself into the tree. Possessive power  
steamed through its veins and embraced the trunk. Now grounded  
in a host, the daimon woke up and stepped free.  
  
"Mikuuji!" it roared. The saying of its name seemed to give  
it power. "Mikuuji!!" It stepped out into the path of the two  
approaching figures. Naru saw it first.  
  
"Oh my God, it's a monster!! Run Ami-chan!"  
  
Ami followed her friend's gaze. Stepping out of the park  
was a grotesque parody of a woman. She had branches and twigs as  
arms and legs, and a crown of leaves for her hair. She was  
closing rapidly, vine-like tendrils reaching out towards the two  
girls.  
  
Ami could sense Naru's panic. She gripped Naru's arm and  
pulled her away. They sprinted down the street, away from the  
monster. A glance back showed that it was gaining. Unlike Naru,  
Ami felt no panic. She had faced and defeated monsters before.   
She needed a ruse to get Naru away so that she could transform.   
Her brain worked coolly on the problem.  
  
"Split up!" she cried. "The monster can't follow us both!"  
  
She pushed Naru down a side street, then veered in the  
opposite direction. The monster paused, creating a bit more  
separation, then started after Ami. Good, she thought.Naru's  
safe. She ducked behind a bush and dredged out her communicator.   
She pressed the "All Call" button and then stood up, hand  
upraised, one small fist enclosing an ornate pen.  
  
"MERCURY STAR POWER !!!"  
  
A pyrotechnic display lit the evening. Soft aqua beams  
merged with electric-blue brilliance. Then came the power. It  
left her nowhere to hide as it washed over her. Her senses  
heightened, but the sense of violation always returned. The  
energy was too..personal..touching her like an unwanted lover.   
She felt forced out front and centre, against her wishes to just  
blend in. After a few seconds, her mind adapted to the new form,  
but she still didn't like it. Not that she had much choice.   
Duty was duty and wants didn't come into it. She made a moue of  
disgust.  
  
Her communicator lit up, showing an emerald-eyed brunette  
with perky hair.  
  
"What's up Mercury?"  
  
In a bit of a hurry due to the approaching monster, she  
machine-gunned out her words.  
  
"Jupiter - monster attack - park near the library".  
  
"Okay girl, I'm on it. Don't attack it by yourself, wait  
for us". Her face faded from the screen.  
  
Ami flushed, Jupiter's words ringing through her mind.   
Don't fight it. Wait for backup. The others wouldn't wait.   
Sure, she was the weakest of them all, but she had her brain.   
She would outthink it. First she had to stall for time. Then  
she would gather information. This was the first supernatural  
attack in two months. Was a new enemy on the rise? She stepped  
out into the street to face the monster, like a gunman in a  
frontier Western movie.  
  
"Hey you! You hideous, uprooted deciduous! You are  
endangering the lives of unprotected citizens, and I will not  
stand for that. In the name of the planet Mercury, I WILL PUNISH  
YOU!"  
  
The monster stopped, puzzled at the change in its quarry.   
Good, Ami thought. Those corny speeches that Sailor Moon uses  
actually work. A touch on her right earring brought up her  
enhanced vision visor, while her left hand deftly flipped open  
her notebook computer. Time to get some data.  
  
* * *  
  
Dr. Mizuno's stroll to the library was interrupted by a  
human missile streaking around the corner. The impact knocked  
her back, while the person who had hit her bounced down hard on  
her bum, letting out an "Oomph!" as she fell. She looked at the  
girl on the ground. The girl's face showed astonishment, then  
recognition.  
  
"Gomen nasai, Mizuno-sensei". The girl started to scramble  
to her feet. "We have to run, there's a monster after us!"  
  
Ami's mother gave her a quizzical look. Who was this again?   
Oh yes, Osaka Naru, her mother owned the jewellery store OSA P.   
She caught the girl by the shoulders.  
  
"What's that, Osaka-san? Is someone chasing you?"  
  
Naru struggled to get free.  
  
"Let me go. We have to get out of here. There's a monster  
after us!"  
  
She was not to be so easily evaded. She held the frantic  
girl.  
  
"Osaka-san, calm down. Nobody's after you. And if they  
are, I can handle it. They wouldn't dare assault a respected  
doctor."  
  
Naru looked back. The street was empty.  
  
"Oh my God! The monster must have gone after Ami-chan  
then!"  
  
In an instant, Dr. Mizuno's tone changed from a detached yet  
considerate voice to a determined, sharper note.  
  
"What's this about my daughter? Is Ami in some sort of  
danger?"  
  
"Yes! That's what I'm trying to tell you! There's a  
monster after us, and it must have followed Ami-chan! She's in  
danger!"  
  
"Osaka-san, I don't believe in monsters. But if Ami is in  
some sort of trouble, I mean to get to the bottom of it. Here."   
She fished into her doctor's bag for a cell phone. "You call the  
police while I go investigate."  
  
She left a dazed Naru standing there with a phone in her  
hands, as she stalked off in the direction from which Naru had  
come. But when she turned the corner, she was unprepared  
for what she saw. Her daughter was nowhere in sight, but faced  
off against each other in the street were two things in which she  
had never believed - a monster, and a Sailor Senshi.  
  
The antagonists were at the side of the road, separated by  
a small bush and a bus stop bench. The monster was tall, easily  
over six feet. She had the body of a beautiful woman, but the  
effect was ruined by the tree-crowned head, wooden roots, and  
grasping claw-like branches where her hands should be. Her  
unearthly being resonated menace.  
  
Compared to the monster, the girl seemed perilously frail.   
She was slim, and short, and could not have been over fifteen  
years of age. Her features were hard to see, as her eyes were  
obscured by some sort of blue visor. She was glancing in  
concentration at a small computer in her left hand, her right  
hand tapping the keys with increasing rapidity. How could she be  
so unconcerned as to the danger? She saw vine-like tendrils  
reaching out towards the seemingly oblivious girl. Her heart  
went out to her.  
  
"Look out!" she cried.  
  
Two heads swivelled towards her, one registering annoyance,  
the other, shock. She belatedly realized that she was standing  
exposed in the street, and had just made herself the object of a  
dangerous monster's gaze. She gulped.  
  
The senshi acted. A girl's voice rang out.  
  
"MERCURY SHABON SPRAY !!!"  
  
Immediately her vision was obscured, as if in a dense fog.   
She felt rather chilly. Amazing what powers these girls must  
have. Well, if she could not see the monster, the monster could  
not see her - she hoped.  
  
* * *  
  
The tree daimon saw its opening. Its quarry had been  
distracted. True, the fog obscured her vision, but she knew her  
opponent's position. She threw her claw-like arms out, intending  
to ensnare the girl, then wrest her heart crystal. It was only  
when her claws met soft resistance, and she heard the soft  
squelching noise, followed by a gurgled scream and the clattering  
of plastic on pavement, that she realized she had miscalculated.  
  
She drew her arms back, reeling in the unwilling burden.   
The girl was already on her knees, hands clenched around the  
wooden arms stuck through her stomach. The once-proud warrior's  
white body suit was now dyed crimson with her own blood. She  
withdrew her arm from the senshi's body, so that she could use  
the hand that had been protruding out her back. More blood  
spurted out of the gaping wound. Deprived of the artificial  
support, her victim collapsed bonelessly to the ground.  
  
The daimon was upset. If the girl died too soon, she would  
not be able to salvage the heart crystal. She had to act  
quickly.  
  
"Now, fool, I will have your crystal."  
  
She opened her dress, exposing a black mark just above her  
heart. An eerie black beam erupted from that spot, and bored  
into the unconscious girl's chest. The girl's body spasmed, then  
out of her body floated a shining red crystal. The magic fog was  
beginning to fade, and in the dying twilight she examined her  
prize.  
  
"This is not the one! There is no talisman here!"  
  
"JUPITER SUPREMU THUNDER!!!"  
  
The words arrived a scant second ahead of the attack. The  
daimon grunted in surprise as a powerful electric bolt coursed  
through her body. She turned to find the source of attack.  
  
She saw another senshi, this one dressed in a green and  
white fuku. Her attacker was a good deal taller than her last  
victim, with a much more aggressive attitude. Obviously, this  
one needed to be taken down quickly.  
  
"MARS BURNING MANDALA!!!"  
  
Rings of fire seared her body. She roared, pain mingling  
with her rage. Off to her left, flanking her, was a raven-haired  
senshi in a red and white fuku, looking very angry. Both her  
opponents were powering up for a second attack. Time to leave.   
She turned to run.  
  
"VENUS LOVELY CHAIN!!!"  
  
Linked loops of shimmering golden energy coiled around the  
daimon's legs. She tripped, and the heart crystal she had been  
holding flew out of her hand, skidded across the street, and came  
to rest by a metal storm drain. None of the combatants noticed  
the tall yellow-and-white clad warrior stooping to retrieve the  
crystal. The short-cropped blonde gathered her prize and  
retreated into the bushes to watch the fight.  
  
  
* * *  
  
The fog had started to dissipate. Through it, Dr. Mizuno  
could see a combat in progress. Three senshi, garbed variously  
in green, red and orange, had trapped the monster in the centre  
of a triangle. The fourth senshi, the blue-clad one she had  
first seen, lay outstretched on the pavement in a pool of  
spreading blood. Kneeling beside her was a girl who was  
obviously none other than the famous Sailor Moon.  
  
She ignored the battle. Her doctor's instincts kicked in.   
She hurried to the downed senshi. Sailor Moon was looking at  
her, mouth agape, a horrified recognition in her eyes. How would  
she know me? Why would I cause her such terror? A riddle to be  
solved later. She put down her doctor's bag and knelt beside the  
fallen warrior. She noticed the abnormal pallor of the skin;  
cold and blood loss. A blue sigil still glowed on the girl's  
forehead. Some sort of astrological symbol - Mercury. This must  
be Sailor Mercury then. She rolled the girl onto her back, and  
saw the full horror of the wound. Blood still spurted weakly  
from the gaping cavity in her stomach, but it would not be much  
longer. She shook her head, once, before she realized what she  
had done.  
  
She stole a glance at Sailor Moon. Tears trembled their way  
down Sailor Moon's cheeks. Her body wracked and shuddered in  
sobs.  
  
"Sailor Moon! Stop your crying and help us out here!"  
  
Dr. Mizuno searched for the exasperated speaker. It was the  
red-skirted senshi. Sailor Venus? No, Mars, of course, the red  
planet. She and the tall brunette were pummeling the monster  
with twin blasts of fire and lightning, while the orange-clad  
senshi struggled to contain her in loops of golden chain.  
  
She watched Sailor Moon's face harden into a look of firm  
resolve. Deliberately, the superheroine raised herself to her  
feet, and faced the monster. Comjuring an ornate sceptre out of  
nowhere, she spoke the words of power.  
  
"MOON PRINCESS HALATION!!!"  
  
A beam of light played over the monster. It was visibly  
weakened, but still defiant. The senshi all looked surprised.   
Sailors Mars and Jupiter started some more attacks, while Sailor  
Moon prepared another assault. She decided the battle was in  
capable hands, and turned back to her patient.  
  
The visor no longer covered her eyes, and bereft of that  
shield, she looked even younger. Probably about Ami's age, she  
thought. Definitely too young to die this way. Where was Ami,  
anyway? She must have escaped when Sailor Mercury showed up.   
What a brave, brave girl. She knew it was hopeless, but she had  
to try. The first thing to do was to stop the bleeding. She  
reached into her bag for a roll of cloth, and started to compress  
the wound.  
  
* * *  
  
Sailor Moon's third attack had finally destroyed the  
monster. The tall watcher stepped into the open as the remaining  
senshi milled around their fallen comrade.  
  
"You'll need this."  
  
The senshi whipped their heads around. She held aloft the  
gleaming heart crystal.  
  
"Who are you? Are you another senshi? Why didn't you help  
us? And what is that you're holding?"  
  
The accusations came from the black-haired girl. The tall  
watcher snorted.  
  
"This is a heart crystal. Without it your comrade will  
die."  
  
She threw the heart crystal towards the group. It hovered  
above Sailor Mercury, then entered the senshi's body. She spoke  
again.  
  
"You children are meddling in affairs too dangerous for you.   
Next time let us handle these monsters. Go play hop scotch or  
something."  
  
She turned away, leaving the girls fuming. Out of sight  
from the senshi, she joined her companion, a sea-green clad  
senshi with aquamarine hair.  
  
"They will be trouble."  
  
Her companion nodded.  
  
"I have foreseen it."  
  
They left together. It was not their concern.  
  
* * *  
  
Dr. Mizuno watched in wonder as the glowing jewel entered  
her patient's chest. That must be the source of their magical  
power! It was in no biology text she had ever read. With the  
restoration of the heart crystal, the girls eyes snapped open,  
although the gaze was vacant and unfocussed. An ordinary person  
would be dead by now, but maybe this girl would make it.  
  
"There's a cell phone in my...."  
  
She stopped abruptly. Naru had her phone. She almost wept  
in frustration. Maybe the police would be able to help when they  
got here. She gave a bitter smile. It didn't matter anyway. The  
girl had maybe two more minutes. A red-gloved hand gripped one  
of her wrists. Not moving her hands from putting pressure on the  
stomach, she looked up into the eyes of Sailor Moon.  
  
"She'll live, won't she? Tell me she'll live!"  
  
The voice was as frantic as the eyes. Dr. Mizuno considered  
lying, but these brave girls deserved the truth. It was what  
they stood for.  
  
"I'm sorry. She has lost too much blood, and her internal  
injuries are fatal. I ... I'm sorry about your friend."  
  
Her words felt inadequate even to her. The senshi all  
gasped. Despite being battle-hardened warriors, they were still  
young girls. She wondered if they had ever seen a comrade fall  
in battle before.  
  
"Mama..." The whisper was barely audible. "Mama..."  
  
She knew it was the end. She had served in the mercy  
missions in Cambodia in her youth, and knew death in all its  
brutal forms. Young soldiers always called out to their mothers.   
There was nothing she could do but comfort her.  
  
"I'm here", she soothed. "Be a brave little angel for me."  
  
A tremor shook the dying senshi at the sound of her voice,  
and a shaking hand lifted to cup the doctor's face.  
  
"Mama!"  
  
There was recognition in her eyes, and as Dr. Mizuno  
returned the gaze, the clues clicked into place. She saw not the  
Warrior of Ice, but the eyes of a little girl with whom she used  
to bake cookies.  
  
"Ami?"   
  
She said it tentatively, not wanting to believe.  
  
"Mama!" There was relief and contentment in the voice. "I  
love you Mama."  
  
This was unreal. Her daughter could not possibly be a  
Sailor Senshi. Could she? She looked around at the anguished  
faces, and knew the truth only too well.  
  
"I love you too, Ami."  
  
There. She had said it. By saying it she had admitted it.   
As if those words had been the blessing for which she had been  
waiting, Sailor Mercury gave a last smile. Dr. Mizuno knew her  
daughter was gone even before her eyes opened for all eternity.   
And with the expiration of her last breath, the transformation  
reversed to leave only a small Tokyo school girl lying on the  
pavement.  
  
"AMI!!"  
  
She broke down and sobbed on her daughter's chest. She was  
oblivious to the strangled noise Sailor Jupiter made, or Sailor  
Venus' heels clicking as she rushed after the departing brunette.   
A sharp voice snapped her out of her stupor.  
  
"Sailor Moon! Can't you do something? Wave your wand and  
make it all better?"  
  
She saw only two people left, a pleading Sailor Mars, and a  
shell-shocked Sailor Moon. Something snapped.  
  
"You!"  
  
She lunged at the leader of the senshi, and shook her by the  
shoulders.  
  
"You! This is all your fault! She's dead because of you!   
Your fighting has taken away my baby!"  
  
She felt Sailor Mars trying to split them apart, then stop.   
Sailor Moon just looked at her with those shimmering eyes, that  
changed colour to an even bluer blue as she watched. Her tears  
mingled with Sailor Moon's as the leader of the senshi embraced  
her. Sailor Moon cupped the tears in her hands, then brought  
both their hands to her chest.  
  
She looked down and saw, glittering like the morning star, a  
brooch unfolding underneath her hands. A bright light sprang  
forth, momentarily blinding her, and red ribbons trailed and  
swirled about. The young girl she had identified as Sailor Moon  
was gone, replaced by a princess in simple white. Deep blue  
pools bored into her soul. She felt an overpowering drowning  
feeling, a mixture of love, compassion, sorrow and ancient  
wisdom. In that intimate moment, she realized the power  
emanating from the princess' body.  
  
"Your tears and my tears, your blood and my blood, your love  
and my love. By the power invested in me through my inheritance,  
I may grant your unspoken wish. You won't be alone again."  
  
The white-gowned princess stepped back, stretching her arms  
out over her daughter's body. She watched as a soft blue glow  
grew steadily more powerful, saw her daughter's body within start  
to knit the wounds. As the last gash faded off her stomach, the  
light abruptly cut out. She looked up.  
  
The princess, or Sailor Moon, or whoever she really was, had  
fainted into the arms of a new arrival, a tall masked man in a  
black tuxedo. The other senshi had gathered around their leader  
in concern. She looked back at her daughter, and her heart  
almost stopped.  
  
Ami was breathing.  
  
Ami was breathing! She felt for the pulse, it was weak, so  
weak, but it was there, her baby was alive. She gazed in awe at  
the girl who could raise the dead.  
  
"Thank you." It was all she could get out.  
  
It was the man who spoke.  
  
"We must leave before the authorities get here. We can  
trust you?"  
  
It was more a statement than a question. There was only one  
honourable answer.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"You know why we must leave?"  
  
Again, the same courtesy, the same compassion, the  
restrained drive. She nodded.  
  
"You will not have to wait alone."  
  
He nodded behind her. She turned to see the disbelieving  
figure of Osaka Naru, peering around the corner, cell phone still  
in her hands. Then Naru came rushing into her arms. They held  
each other, watching Ami's shallow breathing, until the police  
arrived.  
  
* * *  
  
It was late morning. She was still bleary from the events  
of the night before. She had been up with Ami in the trauma unit  
for six hours before she finally felt it was okay to leave. The  
grisly wounds had all been perectly healed, but a massive blood  
transfusion had been needed, and Ami was still in shock. She was  
going in to the hospital again to check on her daughter, but  
first, there was something she had to do.  
  
She opened the door that she seldom opened. She felt that  
she was violating Ami's trust by stepping into her room like  
this. But trust was a two-way street, and she was Ami's mother.  
  
The room was spotless. It was a busy room, but tidy and  
organized. Scientific paraphernalia abounded, from the telescope  
Ami had received from her father, to the globe, through to the  
microscope she had won at the Science Fair. Books on science and  
math filled the shelves. Was that all her daughter was? Last  
night's revelations made that impossible to believe. She decided  
to look closer.  
  
She noted her ex-husband's landscape paintings on the wall.   
One seemed a bit out of place. She moved to take a closer look.   
It was Tokyo Bay as seen from the Tokyo Tower. The style was  
close, but the signature gave it away. 'Mizuno Ami'. She had  
never known. Had she taken the time to know?  
  
She opened the clothes closet, and jumped back. Staring  
back at her was the impassive gaze of Sailor Mercury. The life-  
size poster was taped on the inside of the door. Ami probably  
confronted every morning when she got dressed. She certainly had  
a dry sense of humour. The blue dresses took on added  
signficance. She knew now why Ami had never asked for a computer.   
Sailor Mercury's was probably more powerful than anything out  
there. She prowled the room.  
  
  
Beneath the framed picture of Einstein was a dresser with  
photographs. Ami and her father. What's this? A recent picture  
of Ami and a teenage boy holding hands on a ferris wheel. Did  
her daughter have a boyfriend? What DID she know about Ami  
anyway? Only what Ami had carefully constructed for her. She  
had seen it, believed it, because she had wanted to believe. It  
was much easier than actually getting to know your daughter.   
Self-loathing started to creep in again. She continued her  
search.  
  
In the bottom drawer, at the back, under some panties, was  
an envelope addressed to her. Her hands trembled as she opened  
it.  
  
Mom  
  
If you are reading this, then there was no miracle this  
time, and I will no longer be coming home. I love you  
Mom. You have always been there for me. It was you  
who made me what I am. I am sorry to have kept this  
secret. Do not grieve for me. Instead, help the  
senshi left behind. They will need all the help they  
can get to carry on. I know you will soon figure out  
their identities. Please offer them a safe haven as a  
last request to me.  
  
God bless you  
  
Your loving daughter,  
Ami  
  
You were wrong,Ami, oh so wrong. A miracle did happen. And  
I will not let it go to waste. She looked down with tear-blurred  
eyes at the letter. She had crushed it in her grip. She started  
to laugh, painfully. The letter had suffered the same fate as  
the one she had left for Ami earlier. She smoothed it out as  
best as she could, and managed to get it back into the envelope  
on her second, shaking try. She slid it carefully into her front  
pocket, then turned out the lights and shut the door. It was  
time she did something about that gifted daughter of hers.  
  
* * *  
  
Ami was sitting up in her hospital bed, wanting to go home.   
The doctors said she might be released tomorrow, but she felt  
fine. All this isolation, and no book to read. She looked  
forward to visiting time. It would be great to see the others.   
She wasn't sure how she felt about seeing her mother. What would  
she say? How would her mother react? She felt like the girl  
caught with her hand in the cookie jar.  
  
A nurse poked her head in the door.  
  
"Mizuno-san, you have a visitor."  
  
The nurse withdrew. She saw her mother step into the room.   
She cringed. Then she took a closer look. Her normally cool,  
confident and crisp mother looked old and tentative, and her gaze  
was fixed on the floor. C'mon, Mom, look at me please. Scold  
me, yell at me, say you're sorry. Say something. She waited an  
eternity.  
  
Her mother finally looked up at her, then did something Ami  
hadn't seen her do since her father left. Her mother ran across  
the room, crying, and grabbed her in an all-encompassing hug. No  
words were said, but no words were needed. Five, ten, fifteen  
minutes passed. At long last, her mother released her from her  
grasp.  
  
Ami smiled. It looked like they would get their mother-  
daughter time after all.  
  
The nurse poked her head in the door.  
  
"You have some more..."  
  
"No!"  
  
The voices rang in unison. The nurse left in surprise.   
They both looked at each other, first in shock, then with  
laughter. And Ami knew, this time, that things were going to be  
all right. Her mother broke the tension.  
  
"Ami. I am so proud of you. Can you ... can you tell me  
about yourself?"  
  
* F I N I S *  
  
  
Special thanks once again to:  
  
Naoko Takeuchi, for creating my goddess  
  
Ken Wolfe and +Gradient, for raising the bar  
  
Ken Wolfe, again, for C&C - I'll repay you sometime  
  
W. A. Mozart and T. S. Eliot, for inspiration  
  
And to everyone who wrote to me on my first story.  
  
John Hitchens  
makofan@yahoo.com   



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